COPYWRITING EXAMPLES

Copywriting examples: before-and-after rewrites and why they work

Compare each rewrite with its original.

Good copy is easier to see when you compare it with the weak version. Below are eight rewrites, one annotated modern ad and five questions you can ask of any ad you meet.

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The Direct Response Marketing Playbook, the Ink & Signal book cover

how to use this page

What the examples show

Each rewrite changes one thing and gives the principle behind it. The principle numbers are from the Ink & Signal playbook, which has 100 of them.

The brands and numbers are invented. They exist to show the move, so none of it is a claim about a real company.

FROM THE BOOK · 1 OF 30 EXAMPLE ADS

The Friday-night books problem

Still reconciling receipts on Friday night? LedgerLane imports sales, bank and receipt data into one review queue, so independent shop customers can close the week without rebuilding it in a spreadsheet. See how your last seven days would look.

  • Opens on a situation the reader is living, in their words (Collier)
  • One promise, tied to a job, not a demographic (Hopkins)
  • The next step is small and specific (Kennedy)

eight rewrites

Eight before-and-after copywriting examples

WhereBeforeAfterWhat changedPrinciple
HeadlinePowerful accounting software for growing businessesClose your week’s books in 20 minutes, without a spreadsheet.A category word became a concrete outcome with a number.Specificity beats unsupported hype (no. 5)
Email subjectOur October newsletterThe 3-line email that brought 40 lapsed customers backIt names a result and a format the reader can picture.Let the headline select the right reader (no. 8)
ButtonSubmitSend me the 7-day planThe label says what happens next.Make the next step unmistakable (no. 19)
GuaranteeSatisfaction guaranteed.If your first report finds nothing worth fixing, email us within 30 days for a full refund.The risk is stated in terms the buyer can check.Strengthen the offer before decorating the copy (no. 16)
Landing pageWelcome to Smith & Co RoofingGet your free roof quote within 24 hours.The page now repeats the promise the ad made.Keep the ad and landing-page promise continuous (no. 10)
Product copyOur mattress has premium memory foam and a breathable cover.Sleep cooler: the cover moves heat away, so you stop kicking off the covers at 3 a.m.It sells the night, not the materials.Sell the destination, not the vehicle (no. 4)
ProofOur clients love us.Since March, 214 shops have cut their weekly close from 3 hours to 20 minutes.A number sits beside the claim.Use proof beside the claim it supports (no. 12)
Plain languageLeverage our omnichannel solutions.Answer every customer from one inbox, whether they wrote by email, chat or Instagram.It says what a customer would say.Use the customer’s language (no. 2)

a checklist

Five questions to ask of any ad

  1. Who is it for, and does the headline pick them out?
  2. What is the promise, and is it specific?
  3. What proof sits next to the claim?
  4. What is the offer, and what is the risk to the reader?
  5. What is the next step, and is it small enough to take now?

Keep the ads that pass in a swipe file, with a line on why they worked.

more of the same

30 worked examples and 14 famous ads

The playbook has 30 modern example ads with notes. The companion Workbook, $47 on its own or $27 when you add it at checkout, takes apart 14 famous ads chapter by chapter, each with the original ad and a link to see it.

the playbook

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  • The 48-page playbook (A4 PDF)
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30-day money-back guarantee. If the book is not for you, write to hello@inkandsignal.co within 30 days and we refund you in full, and you keep the PDF.

before you go

Common questions

What is good copywriting?

Copy that gets a specific action from a specific reader. It names the reader, makes one clear promise, shows proof and makes the next step easy.

Are these real ads?

No. The brands and numbers here are invented for illustration, so nothing on this page is a claim about a real company.

Where can I see real, famous ads?

The Ink & Signal Workbook takes apart 14 famous ads, each with the original ad and a link to see it, and a worksheet for every chapter.

What is direct response copywriting?

Copywriting written to get a measurable action now, such as a purchase, a call or a sign-up. Every example on this page is direct response.

How do I improve my own copy using examples?

Rewrite it against a checklist. Ask who it is for, what it promises, what proves it, what the offer is and what the next step is. Then change the weakest answer first.

keep reading

Related

Swipe file

What to save, how to organize it and how to use it.

What is direct response marketing?

A plain definition, with examples and the numbers to track.

Curiosity headlines that convert

Attach the gap to a stake.